Ep 103. Why We Cry

You know that feeling. Your lip starts quivering and despite your best effort you’re unable to stop the waterworks. Crying is an automated response to intense emotion and it’s a part of our humanness. It’s nothing we need to apologize for. Our natural response is to begin worrying about what other people think or to tell ourselves to stop but neither of these is going to be helpful. Instead, just give yourself a moment. Pause. Breathe. Remind yourself that you are just feeling an emotion intensely. It’s not a problem. When necessary, a good cry can be healing and releases the energy created by the emotion. Check out today’s episode for more help with all of this.

6 replies
  1. Jodee says:

    Hi Jody! I just found your podcasts a few weeks ago and have been loving them so much! Thank you so much for your work. I have already seen positive changes in myself as I have been deliberate about managing my thoughts.
    I was wondering if you might be able to do a podcast on any advice you have for women who’s husbands have addictions. My husband has legitimate chronic pain that has developed into a addiction to pain medications. It has negatively affected every part of our life for the past 8 years. We have 4 children ranging from 9-4 months old. I feel alone much of the time in my raising them. He sleeps most of the time he isn’t at work. He has little motivation to do anything.

    I know he needs his own help with his addiction.

    He has lied to me so many times and left me to do most everything around the house and with the kids.
    I have gone from being compassionate and trying to help to feeling immense anger and sadness. I am trying to manage my thoughts and love him despite his addictions. If you could offer some advice as to HOW to not let his behavior make me angry and resentful I would be so greateful.

    Thank you!

    Reply
    • Jody Moore says:

      Hello Jodee and thank you for listening! Your husband is responsible for himself. The way he shows up. The way he deals with his addiction. The way he is as a husband. The way he gets what he needs and wants in the world. It’s his responsibility and you can support, encourage, love him along the way but you must be clear that he is responsible for him. You are responsible for you. The way you show up. The way you feel. The way you get what you want and need in the world. We have these hopes that other people will meet our needs and sometimes they do. But when they don’t we can keep waiting for them to change or find other ways to get what we want and need. Your husband is not the one to provide it for you. Resentment is always a result of us waiting for someone else to meet our needs. It’s not going to be him. How else can you get what you need? Make it happen mama. You’ve got this.

      Reply
  2. jamie10harper@gmail.com says:

    Just wanted you to know I left a review, and signed up for the BeBold and I’m loving it!
    But as I listened to this today, I had 2 questions;
    1. I am not a cry-er. I never cry happy tears, and RARELY in a movie or book, but I DO cry when I’m overwhelmed or when I’m fighting with my husband. We don’t fight a lot and he is really a great guy, but when we do fight I cry. I feel unvalued (I’m going to change that though through your program!). My husband feels like crying is a manipulation tool designed to ‘win the fight’. So right when my body is screaming for compassion and empathy it causes him more anger and frustration. so I try to hide the crying, but then I feel like he cares about me even less. Ideas for stopping the tears or calming him over my tears?
    2. WHY is there such a thing as Sunday headaches? my husband, and his family all get them! Why? I hadn’t heard of other people getting them so I kind of thought their family was looney! lol!

    Reply
    • Jody Moore says:

      Hello!
      1. You’re not in charge of how he feels. You can cry and he can be angry about it and that’s none of your business. If you want to cry then cry. If you don’t want to then don’t. But you’re trying to be in charge of his feelings and that never works.
      2. I think it’s because of 3-hours of church, not enough caffeine. We should start taking Big Gulps to church I think. 🙂
      Thanks for being part of this community and for your question.

      Reply

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