Studies show that 100% of our kids will view pornography by age 18. On episode 111 I talked about some useful ways to think about porn when this happens or if you have a spouse who views it. Today we’re continuing the conversation about this important and sensitive topic. I believe knowledge is power and the more we know about the effects of pornography and useful ways to interact with one another, the more we’ll be able to show up as our best, most loving, most capable selves. Dr. Brian Willoughby is one of the top scholars on this topic and a Professor at BYU. I found his insights and research to be fascinating and empowering and I know you will too. Whether you have a loved one who views pornography or you want to empower yourself for the day your kids view it, trust me… you don’t want to miss this episode.

3 replies
  1. Tess says:

    Thank you for this podcast. I have been an avid listener now for almost a year and you have touched on this topic multiple times. I am not a member of the LDS church and it is interesting to me to hear how other religions and women view this topic. I was raised Catholic. I am not sure why but I just don’t have such a strong view on pornography, as bad, wrong, etc. I know my faith does not condone it, but I am indifferent. If my husband came and told me he viewed it, I am not sure I would really care to be honest or even be shocked. And to be clear, he probably has watched it and I don’t look at that as wrong. In fact, I am more curious to find out why it is, I don’t mind so much. I wonder if I don’t care because I have such a strong sense of who I am and what I bring into our relationship? I love my body – its not perfect, its had two kids, but everyday I get more confident in it as long as I continue to take care of it. I don’t know. These are just my thoughts from a woman who is not an LDS member.

  2. Marianne Meiners says:

    Thank you so much for this podcast. Brian Willoughby was one of my professors at BYU and he was awesome! So I was so happy when I saw his name. I love the counsel he gave to women–to not have those huge meltdown reactions to their husband’s porn use. I hope I can form the relationship with my children where they always feel comfortable coming to me with their questions or experiences they’ve had (like seeing porn).

    One of Dr. Willoughby’s colleague’s, Dr. Laura Walker, just gave a lecture on campus about talking to our kids about sex and what the latest research is telling us. It was fascinating! One of the main points that came across from the research was, it doesn’t matter necessarily what topics we talk about with our children (porn, STDs, puberty, sexuality, etc.); what matters is that we have a warm, open relationship with them. Also, our comfort level as parents is huge. If our kids sense that we are embarrassed or uncomfortable, they will take that as a sign that sexuality in general is a no no topic to discuss with us. I know Dr. Fife touched on that too. Anyway, such good stuff! Here’s the link to Dr. Walker’s lecture if anyone is interested:

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